heys! its been long since i last blogged...
hmmm.. stuff have been great until recently...

hmm.. i guess is more of family problems bahs... lols...
coz i don't know whats gotten into them.
and i have becomed so irritable to everyone...
so i have been trying my best to smile and talk like before...
but it just feels so fake... damn...
so here. if you think i have a perfect family,
then you thot wrong.

sigh... I actually am starting to hate my life.
too much pressure from my dad.
just becoz i got into EEE in the same school as him doesn't mean he have to force me to study every freaking day of my present hols right?
gosh... i dun even have some breathing space...
it's at this kinda time that makes me wish ill of him
grgh... sigh... and there just seems to be so much friction between me and everyone of them
i hate me...
why can't i handle stress better or something?
gosh. and i wish my dad will just grow up and appreciate the people ard him!
when i start work and become a somebody i promise to bring my mum to shopping and spa every freaking day.

gosh... i'm so tense i think i can bite off the head of an elephant.
grgh!!! and my dad does stuff behind my back! and he is so mean with his words!!!
i dunno what to say to him anymore... stuff isn't just so simple...
asshole. i hate this! i'm not someone who handles stress and decision making well!
i mean.. haiyos.
i just want this all to end. i dunno how and i suppose to solve this.
but i will find a way.
no matter how hard.
=) coz i know deep down my dad has my best interest.
but he is just too asshole like and too freaking childish and control freak,
can't let me do stuff my way.
gosh. hate this kinda feeling...

damn...
sigh... in this post i shall not talk about my day... hmmm...
today, while watching Coffee Prince i suddenly recalled an incident.
:) i remember there was this one time where i felt really upset and stressed up
over something that happened at home, and something that happened over the phone.
the feeling is just too overwhelming... well... at least i think the phone thing was.
lolx. sigh.... i know that i should type everything here... but i can't coz i paiseh!
lolx... hmmm...

anyways... what happened pver the phone really made me feel very very uncomfortable...
and i felt really upset over it. felt like the person took my feelings and just,
jumped all over it and threw it in the blender.
:( it was just horrible.... the caller didn't even think about my feelings!
made me feel like i'm some insignificant fly.

BUT I'M NOT!!!
i know it now... all thanks to Cain. :) i really think he is a great trainer... :)
everytime i'm sad, and feel like a freak,
he is there to encourage me to keep my chin up.

hahaa... he is working as a trainer.
not my counseller.
:) but he is still so nice and ultra sweet to me about my life and feelings...
i'm so touched! hahaa

that day... i went to the gym with a heavy heart...
felt so damn ugly...
and well... he just put his arms around my shoulder and said,
hey, i'm always here for you girl.
:)

yups. so just decided to publish this post... hahaa...
so if you see any friends who are feeling weird...
just do the same! :)
confirm break down like me de!!!

lolx...

:)
woke up late today! damn...
so daddy was ultra nice and sent me to gym...
:( but when i realised that i lost my bet with Cain...
i was like ultra sad... :) hahaa...
so Cain ultra gentleman!!!
he set another target for me!!!
this time he is super sweet... he promise to treat me to pizza...
of coz... i must reach the target weight in... abt more weeks...
damn... :)

still worth it i think...
lols! heys!!! guess what? went shopping with mummy at IMM!!!
and she bought me lots of new clothes... :) i love my parents...
hahaaa... anyways... i tried on a few for daddy and he said not bad...
i guess coz he in good mood... (i had to watch chinese news with him)
{THE HORROR!!!!} hahaa... imagine that!!!
anyways... today started and ended well...
wesley said i slimmed down abit!!! whoa!!!
:)i'm glad that there are changes...
a small comment of his brighten up my day tremendously!!!(sp?)
hahaa.... i love MICHELLE!!!!